A Big Bowl of Fuck You
So life around here is normal. It’s been normal and good with few bumps other than the normal ones caused by a submissive housemouse picking up a job for a good, long time.
It’s been, what? A year? Since I had angst?
Ack.
I need angst!
Actually, I do have stuff I angst over. It’s just repetitive to post about it here. Again. So I kind of keep it to myself and try to work thru it. One of these days I’ll make an angst list to share with my new readers. heh.
Until then? I haz rants. (Well, and reviews. They’ve taken over!)
Let’s start with rant number one, shall we?
Fuck you, bloggers and reviewers who feel like you’re somehow famous because you either blog about sex or fuck yourself with rubber dicks and tell us about it.
Seriously.
Fuck you.
You’re not famous. You’re not even VERY important! You’re a person with extra time on your hands who likes the attention you get from telling folks about your life. Assuming you’re a regular blogger. If you’re a sex blogger, you like the attention you get telling folks about your sex life or sex fantasies. If you’re a reviewer, you like the attention you get from telling people about sex toys.
You likely enjoy the power, as well.
Except that.
Surprise!
You don’t HAVE any.
You’re not fucking famous. You’re not going to impact a sex toy companies sales with your piddling review enough to “ruin” them. It’s definitely not a “bad business move” for them to refuse you toys when you come begging.
Sure, you bring them a bit of traffic. Your links help them a little. But in the scheme of things? You don’t matter.
And your diva, I’m famous attitude? *snort*
It’s pathetic.
I review toys cuz it’s fun. Cuz I make a bit of affiliate money on occasion. No one owes me anything. I’m not famous. I’m not a celebrity sponsor. And I’m totally, totally not worth more than anyone else out there other than for my traffic. I may be worth more as an advertising/marketing source if I get more hits than you. (Which, yanno, I do. Ain’t I famous!!!!!!!!!)
So really. Fuck you. Fuck your entitlement. Fuck your ego. Fuck your vanity. Fuck your negativity and unconcern for the very people who provide you with the means to fuck yourself. Fuck your snarky attitude. Fuck your sarcasm.
You fuck yourself for free toys and attention.
You’re not famous.
You’re not special.
You’re not better than anyone else just because you’re oh so sexually liberated and have a blog that features sex or sex toys.
In fact, in some people’s eyes, you’re nasty for those very reasons.
And, you know what? You’re in no position to tell them they’re wrong. Cuz it’s they’re opinion. And, you know, if you value the right to spew yours (as I obviously do) you also have to value their right to spew theirs. Even if it means they think you suck ass.
So let’s stop playing like we’re special and famous and oh so fucking important and go back to behaving like a considerate human being with a bit of common courtesy for others, shall we?
Cuz…
You’re not famous.
And even if you were, the attitude? It’s fucking ugly, man.
p.s. This is not about YOU. Or perhaps it is. If the shoe fits, and you feel all offended, either take the shoe off or… fuck you.
You’re my hero today.
Thank ya. :)
I still need to ship your stuff, btw. Gah. I’ll have the car tomorrow so I promise to get it out!
AWESOME AWESOME AWESOME
.-= Champagne and Benzedrine´s last blog ..Nancy McDermott tells intactivists to ‘cut the crap.’ =-.
Why thank you. I’m tickled that ya like it. I have a giant boner for your ranty type posts, yanno. :)
What a great word “fuck” is. And you wear it so well!! ;-)
Jade
.-= Jade´s last blog ..Next Post =-.
I should SO start doing video rants.
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I love you.
You are my hero too!
xoxo
That is because we share a brain!
Wait, what—I’m not famous? I’m not special? B-b-but the sex toy fairy promised me world domination, dammit! And everybody is supposed to have a shrine built in my honor in their bedroom. No? Damn fairy. Can’t trust the bastards.
You give good rant, doll. :-)
.-= Eliot´s last blog ..Love Our Lurkers =-.
You were lied to.
The fairy is a troll. With stinky shoes. Hehehehe.
Thank ya, btw. :)
Love it! :-)
.-= Sammi´s last blog ..Cold and Hot Weekend =-.
Thank ya!
That’s my girl.
So yeah fuck you!
Oh and one more thing, most of you are ugly to boot. So, yeah go fuck yourself some more and shut the fuck up already.
lmao
You are NOT a nice man.
[...] more from the original source: A Big Bowl of Fuck You Tags: a-job-for, angst-list, angst-over-, bumps-other, life-around, myself-and, need-angst, [...]
Pure and utter awesomness CarrieAnn.
It’s about time someone let them know that they are not famous, special or otherwise entitled to, well, anything.
I can’t stand people like that. *rawr*
Rawr is right. :)
I’m torn. I feel ya on this. Some folks are a little crazy on the entitlement train. Plus , I know that my holy crusade of sex toys is laughable in the long run. A company won’t die cause of what I say or do. I’ve worked customer services and I’ve seen the temper tantrums and the boycott threats (they always come back, though!) On the other hand, how can one ever be sure they don’t fall into this group? How can you be sure it’s entitlement that motivates people? How can we know that’s not the case for you? And just because I may only be one person doesn’t mean I won’t speak up when I see the need for it. I may not have power but I have the ability to spread the word a bit and sometimes it needs to be spread.
.-= Adriana´s last blog ..Elsewhere =-.
Oh, I totally get speaking up and all that.
But emailing companies and saying you’re famous? Hinting they’ve made a bad business decision by declining to give you free stuff and then bad mouthing them? It’s a little much.
And a lot dishonest.
And smacks of entitlement.
It irks me. :(
And you obviously know I don’t mean you. :)
Well if that’s the case, it is an… interesting way to go about making friends. d=
.-= Adriana´s last blog ..Kinklab padded leather blindfold =-.
Ha hah haha, you’re awesome. I can only aspire to reach the level of awesome you have attained, with this single post. Because wow, you pretty much hit the nail on the head. lmao xD
.-= Purple-Foxglove´s last blog ..Another Cool Contest =-.
You’re far more awesome.
I’m just a bitch. ;)
Oh come the fuck on. You’re one of the MOST self important bloggers I know and you have the balls to try and rag on everyone else?
Ever since you joined the program, all you did was whine and cry about how everyone else got more than you cause you couldnt get in the description review program. Now that you work at EF you get whatever the fuck you want and you can’t try to act like you don’t brag about it. You got a Sasi as a gift for doing 100 reviews, and you can’t say it wasn’t favoritism. Then you try and say you get more hits than everyone else. Really? so you’ve been through all our analytics accounts and seen everything every one of us gets?
If you don’t act self entitled, I don’t know WHO does. Plus, you lie about fucking everything. You will write ANY review as overwhelmingly positive, and then it ends up on toyswap cause you ‘didn’t really like it’. You’re more of a self-famous sextoy sellout than anyone else who ever thought of reviewing.
So either this is you practicing irony at its finest, or you just can’t look in the mirror.
Let’s take this point by point, shall we?
1. I didn’t want to be in the description program when it first went into effect but I was approved the first time I was asked. And have often been asked to review high priority toys, like the Form 6, because I do a good job in a timely manner. Yes, even before I worked for EF. :)
2. I do not get whatever I want. In fact, I have been denied more stuff since I started working there then ever before. I do, however, do offsite reviews for Drew’s marketing program, do descriptive reviews, do regular and sponsored reviews plus I run the video review program and will soon be doing staff reviews on EC along with other staff members. That may make it seem like I get whatever I want. But the stuff I truly want? Like the Benjamin Bond and the pure wand and pfun plug? I bought them. With, you know, money. And no discount other than my buy out. Because unlike the rest of you, I don’t qualify for the special discounts BECAUSE i’m an employee. Use your brain and check. Most of my expensive items are non verified reviews or were buy outs.
3. Yes, I did get the SaSi as my gift for doing 100 reviews. Sleeping Dreamer got the harness she’d been wanting for a long time but was out of her reviewing price range. It was a gift. If you get to 100 reviews, you’ll get one too. It has nothing to do with me working for EF
4. I didn’t say I got more hits than anyone. I said I got more hits than “you”. Very generic. And very sarcastic. You DO know the meaning of sarcasm, right? Here. Let me help you. “A form of humor that is marked by mocking with irony, sometimes conveyed in speech with vocal over-emphasis. Saying something that is opposite of what is intended to be meant; An act of sarcasm”
5. I don’t brag about the stuff I get. I speak excitedly, mostly about the stuff I BUY. Oh, wait. I’ll bet you’re one of the ones who never does that.
6. I can give a positive review about a well made, good toy and still… gasp!… not personally like the toy. Yes, most of my reviews are positive. But I choose good toys. Really. Go look. And the stuff I don’t like I explain why. I put stuff on toyswap because… another gasp!… I HAVE OVER A HUNDRED TOYS. I don’t need them all. If someone else may like them more than me why not trade for something I may like better. Or that I may find new and entertaining. You don’t get bored of toys? Oh, wait. That’s right. You probably don’t get to use yours often. Mommy might here you.
7. I’m not famous. Neither are you. That was… my point. I do apologize if you think I feel that way. But I don’t. I’m just a bitch who likes to rant. It’s fun. Entertaining. Amusing to me. And, like everyone else has been saying lately… it’s my blog. I can. :)
8. I don’t lie. I’m one of few bloggers/reviewers out there who is utterly out. I have nothing to lie about. I have videos of my fat ass getting ass fucked out there. I link to my vanilla facebook. I’ve done demos in multiple cities for BDSM stuff. I was on the board of a BDSM organization. I work for a sex toy company. I’m going to an art show next week that is adult in nature. I’m totally out. I have no reason to lie. I have too many people who actually… omg, another gasp!… KNOW me reading this blog to lie. I’d be called out in a heartbeat.
9. Your jealousy is showing.
10. Your anonymous name doesn’t hide you.
11. ( Spinal Tap Style) Fuck off.
This is great reading! Carrie Ann you are my hero in the deepest respect. The next time some one fucks with me, I’m going to take on a “Carrie Ann” persona. I love it! Go get ‘em girl!
.-= gardenvy´s last blog ..Get Laid.. =-.
OUCH!
did you have certain people in mind when you wrote this? god, i hope i’m not one of them. luckily, i’ve never considered myself famous. infamous…maybe. ;-)
.-= dr dick´s last blog ..Sex Advice With An Edge – Podcast #160 – 10/14/09 =-.
Bunches of certain people. :P But of course not you. You don’t exhibit the right traits for a “fuck you”. Though you often elicit a “fuck yes!” when I read your stuff!
Looks like someone got hurt by the truth.
Lies? Bitch please.
The only way a person is going to throw that much of a fit over this post is if they are UNDENIABLY guilty of exactly what was being ranted about.
I heard that as “bish”, you know that, right?
By the way, it’s spelled favoritism, illiteracy is such a shame.
It stands to reason that when one does an honest review on a toy, instead of acting like a self inflated cunt, they will be treated better than those who do behave like self inflated cunts.
Well I’m a little bit clueless as to who this might refer to, but then again that’s not really surprising for me, is it?
I can think of a couple people who it could be directed at if *I* wrote it…..but I am 100% certain that they’re not even in your radar ;)
I agree on the reviewing-because-it’s-fun thing. “Fun” had me reviewing for too many companies at once though, so I narrowed it down to the best.
Dammit, I had more thoughts. And more cheek & snark to add into the chorus. But the back pain ate the thoughts. Oh there is one I remember: I second the notion that this woulda been awesome as a video rant.
.-= Lilly´s last blog ..1-2-3-4 Tell Me That You Love Me More =-.
Aw hon. I sure hope your pain gets better soon. That is teh suck, for sure. :(
Oooooooo. OUCH! You are one mean bitch today CarrieAnn.
Eh. I’m a bitch most days. I just get super bitchy on Wednesday.
and here I was thinking you would be super nice on Hump Day…….what the hell is Taylor doing to you on Wednesdays? Lmao, maybe you just need surprise buttsex!
.-= Cinnamon´s last blog ..Not the Diva I Expected =-.
Niiice… fuckin awesome. You go chick!
.-= Angel deSanguine´s last blog ..Happy National Coming Out Day 09! =-.
I feel like I’m on Oprah or something with all the “go girls”. Heheheheh
I have but three words after reading this epic, awesome, wonderful rant:
Glory. Hallelujah. Amen.
(and fuck is such a fun word)
(can I join the “Carrie Ann is My Hero” club too? hahah)
Nah. Just rant on your blog too so I’m not the only one.
I suck at the whole hero thing.
:P
Locked, cock, and two smoking fingers. It seems that the wolf among the sheep has called them self out.
It is good to see that some people still remember that they are mortal beings living down here on Earth with the rest of the human race. This industry isn’t the only thing that suffers from this behavior- hell, you can work for NASA or White Castle and find two people that both think they are top shit.
At least the folks at NASA are likely doing something vaguely important. LOL
I’ve got a buddy at NASA (no shit) and he begs to differ ;)
You go girl!!!!
I’ll bet that rant “Fuckin” felt good!!!
It did. I was holding it in for a long ass time.
Fucking famous. A celebrity amongst bloggers. I mean, seriously. Who actually SAYS that and doesn’t expect it to be grating?
I <3 you. But you know that.
And what's this shit about I unfollowed Taylor? I'm such a dumb ass. I had no idea that was him. But then, I suck at checking profiles. As in, I don't do it. And in tweetdeck those pics are way too tiny to know what they are unless they're boobs. lol
.-= Melen's Rayne´s last blog ..SJP#73 – No thank you! =-.
AWESOME RANT! Made my morning. Thank you! :D
I’m so fucking fucked up I don’t care whether I’m famous or not.
Love your ‘tude….
`x~Abe’s Heart.
.-= Abe’s Heart´s last blog ..no title =-.
lol… i wrote out a WHOLE thingy here.. forgot to add my name and email..duh… so, i go click back- EVERYTHING i wrote is gone! lol… so, im gonna try to remember it all and re write it..lol…
OH. MY. GOSH! i dont read for a couple days and WOW!
im glad the person responded because i was sratching my head, going huh? who? lol..
girly girl, you laid it out PERFECTLY! GOOD JOB!
i love the reviews you do- you tell the good, the bad and the ugly- just what we want you to do- well, i do at least..lol.
i want you to know that i love just the plain ol’ blogger you too… you make me think- you make me smile and laugh.. so thank you for all of it!
hugs,
Hisflower
p.s.
hey, if ya ever do get FAMOUS, could i get your autograph?? pretty please??..lol
duh- that was “scratching” my head…
in my first draft my spelling was PERFECT..lol
Isn’t that just how it always works? And then no one believes you! Lolol
mh
Rofl too funneh. Nice rant ;)
.-= vanimp´s last blog ..Handful? ~ HNT =-.
OMG, giggles! i don’t think anyone reads my blog, but i think i am hot stuff anyway, lol
nah, but good to see i am not the only one out here.
There is a particular person in my head while reading said rant though………..
LMAO – um…i thought the post was entertaining until i got to the comment from your Master and then i just lost my shit all together. Now i am sitting here explaining all to Beast having the giggles…i guess i shoulda read this to get over my pissy mood earlier.
i do have to say in my sarcastic tone a quote said to me when i was on a brutal honest rant; “when have you ever been out for a f’n popularity contest”? i guess i missed that appointment too…
.-= viemoira´s last blog ..Whore Moans =-.