So I’m supposed to be all happy and shit. I mean… the Dude I love just asked me to marry him, Christmas is coming – which is my very favorite time of year, our financial situation is looking up – despite some big debts… and here I sit, stuck in the middle of a bunch of bullshit.
And when I try to tell people I don’t want to be in the middle, when I try to nicely say “Look, I can’t do this. I can’t fix the situation and I get really stressed when I’m put in the middle of everything”, I get a bunch of anger and resentment and the silent treatment. Then when *I* get pissed over having to deal with the silent treatment and the “woe is me, I can’t say anything, I’ll just shut up” bullshit I get looked at like I have seven heads and treated as if there is something wrong with me for being stressed out and pissed off.
Yanno…
Sometimes I just can’t win. And I definitely ain’t allowed to get pissed or crabby – even though everyone else can.
Fuck it. I’m taking a bath.
I drink a lot of coffee, ride a motorcycle, have an 18 year old son and a decade long relationship that began in a chat room.
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