Femblossom Heat

April 2, 2012 By In Reviews No Comment

I picked up the Femblossom Heat intending to use it as more of a massager than a clitoral stimulator.  I have enough clitoral stimulators and sex toys to last me a life time but a small, portable, ergonomic shoulder massager that heated up? It seemed like maybe I was about to meet my new best friend.

Alas, it was not to be.

The Femblossom Heat is nice enough.  It’s fairly strong and it’s colorful and it has that slightly spa-like look to it that makes it very non threatening and discreet. It could be for anything, not just a toy for getting off.  It has a fantastic anti-bacterial agent built into the material to help keep it clean — which means you can basically, in theory,  rinse and store without having to worry overly much.  It’s rechargeable so you don’t have to worry about batteries or plugging it in to use it.

But the reality turned out to be that it is very light weight to the point it felt poorly made, is very, very loud, very, very buzzy and takes way too long to heat up.  Plus? If you do use it for clitoral stimulation you’re going to want to do more than rinse and store cuz goo is going to get caught in the texture and in the seams.  Add to that the fact that it takes almost all day to charge once it has discharged fully and doesn’t hold a charge in storage all that well and it just…

Well, it’s not my new best friend, for sure.  In fact, holding it in my hand makes my whole hand go numb it’s so buzzy and it was a chore to actually try to use it.

Those are personal issues, of course.  Just because I don’t like the Femblossom Heat doesn’t mean someone else is going to hate it. You may love it!  You just have to know what your needs are and determine if the Femblossom meets them.  For me, it did not.

On the technical side, the Femblossom Heat is made from body safe plastic and, as mentioned, an anti-bacterial agent infused textured material that needs only (in theory) be wiped down and minutes later will be 100% sanitized and ready to be used again.  It is 7 inches long and 3 1/2 inches wide.  It is very light weight which to me transfers to a kind of chintzy feeling in the hand but can be very good for those who have hand pain, fatigue or arthritis as it is easy to hold.  The shape is quite ergonomic, with a narrow handle and wider tip to give broad stimulation to a wide area.

The Femblossom cups the vulva (or shoulders, arms, thighs, knees, calves, neck) well.  The texture adds a bit of stimulation but is not painful or obtrusive.  I would definitely suggest lube or massage lotion of some sort, however, since it is a matte material and will drag against the skin if there is no moisture.

Controls are easy to use; a on off button, a plus button and a minus button.  Turn it on via the power button, scroll through 3 steady vibration levels and six different patterns using the plus and minus button. Turn it off using the power button again at any time.

Charging is done via a jack you plug into the charging port (uncovered) on the Femblossom and then into the wall.  Because it is uncovered it is NOT waterproof so take care not to get water or lube into the port.  I would suggest charging this one after each use since charge time is quite long and it doesn’t hold a charge in storage exceptionally well.  You get about 90 minutes max with medium to high intensity use and it takes at least 6 hours to charge.  In order to be sure you can get a full use or two out of a charge, prepare in advance and just plug it in after you use it.  The power button lights up and flashes while it is charging in a steady, thrumming kind of flash and will burn steady after it is completely charged.

The heating function is, at best, okay.  It required that you run the vibrator for 10 – 15 minutes to fully activate it and given that it is quite loud, this isn’t a lot of fun.  You either have to listen to it for awhile, buzzing off to the side, before you use it or you have to use it the first little bit without heat.  In terms of usefulness, it seems to get not quite hot enough to feel good on big muscles for massage but a little too hot for bare skin on your sensitive bits.

For me, the Femblossom just didn’t cut it.  I prefer the Infrared massager for a heated massager and would much rather use the MiMi or Eroscillator as a clitoral stimulator any day.  As always, your mileage may vary

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