Vanity
I have a single vanity, a single conceit.
My hair.
No matter the color or style I tend to have very nice hair.
It’s thick – oh so very thick. Luxurious. Shiny.
And, at the moment, quite long. It’s layers flirt with my breasts in the front but stream halfway down my back behind me. I’ve recently added quirky little bits of pink to the bangs and the undermost layer; bits that peek and tease from under all the dark.
See?
Vanity. Conceit. Pridefulness.
Taylor’s talked, lately, about noticing it.
Oh, he loves my hair. Loves it this long and actually bought me the pink for Christmas. He strokes it often. Runs his hands thru it and over it. Fondles a few locks while laying in bed, reading a book. In fact, the last time I cut it to my shoulders he didn’t touch it for a good long while.
We had a conversation a week or so ago about it.
Subtle threats were made about somehow altering it, cutting it.
I cried.
I have so little self confidence about my body or looks it would be disastrous to my self esteem to do something with my hair that made me look “ugly”. Not to mention anything he did would likely be something he ended up hating, hence backfiring in a way.
I dunno. I try not to think about it, yanno?
He has the right to shave me bald if he wants to but…
Anyhow.
Most days I don’t bother with a dryer and flat iron and whatnot. I do that routine only a couple times a week. It’s bad for the hair to apply all that heat all the damned time. And if I dry and style it one day it looks about the same the next and I only wash it every other day. Most days I let it air dry, let it fall in it’s natural almost waves. (It’s not curly, not straight – somewhere between wavy and straight.) I clip it up a lot cuz otherwise it gets in our food and all over the flat.
So.
Yesterday we went out for dinner and I did the whole hair dryer, velcro curlers for root lift, flat iron for no flyaways, curling iron to make the ends flirty thing. Taylor likes it best styled so I was glad to do it, knowing it would look nice today too.
Five hours later the asshole dragged my into the bathroom and pissed all over my head and face.
My hair didn’t look so good after that.
BWAHAHAHA! You made me snort.
That was funny. :D
Ha! That was funny.
On a more serious note, I’ve been thinking about my vanity concerning my hair in recent weeks as well. Mostly spurred by my mother’s experience with baldness this fall. She went from tears over strands falling out, to doing the wig and scarf thing and now she’s just happy to not have to wash and style and care for her hair and finds the whole thing very liberating.
And, I think she actually looks good bald. I didn’t expect that. But, I’ve been imagining going through that experience, given that my hair is one of the parts of my body i truly love.
I don’t blame you for crying over threats to cut it at all. As critical as women tend to be over their bodies and perceived faults…to actually have things about our bodies we genuinely love is pretty darn important to balance the negativity we feel about the rest.
No shaving the head Taylor! It will take months to grow back and you will hate every moment of every minute of every hour of ever day waiting for it to come back!
~Laurel
Ohhhh, I so hear ya on this one. My hair is also my vanity. It’s fairly straight, and fine, and it’s taken me forever to grow it this long. Like yours, it’s mid-breast in front and about bra-strap length in the back.
And in the last year I’ve had 2 seperate trims for a total of about 6 or so inches lost.
And I always used to think that pissing on my hair would be the worst thing, that I’d hate it. Anywhere but that, please.
LOL.. and you know what I’m gonna say, right? Turns out piss soaked hair is a major hot spot for me, in a good way.
It’s getting long enough to be bothersome again… I trap myself on it in bed sometimes, and it’s forever getting stuck in my purse straps or briefcase straps, and on windy days it gets stuck in the car door or window. The greys are popping up like crazy again , and I’m seriously thinking about cutting and/or coloring.
I would hate the bald thing. Maybe to the point of serious clinical depression. I completely get what you’re saying in that regard.
I bet the pink streaks are adorable, tho. Wish I could do that.
~lizzy
LOL.. ok a much needed laugh for the day… thank you..
and can i say i am jealous.. BIG time jealous??!!! both my girls have thick curly hair .. definitely NOT from my side of the family…….. and i am jealous of them too.. i have “baby” hair.. fine limp never grew up kind of hair.. so yah i am jealous!!
morningstar (owned by Warren)
*Snort*
Oh.
Oh.
I see how ya all are.
Laughin’ at me! ;)
Just wait ’til the next time YOU guys get pissed on!
(Did I mention I loved the hell out of it? Piss in my eye kinda sucked but – oh gods – that humbled feeling. *dreamy sigh*)
Too funny!
i am sure in his mind, the better you looked and the more time you took, the more fun to destroy….makes me think maybe he will just torment you about a major change..sounds like he loves your locks, too!